Sunday, December 10, 2006

Unmitigated Aesthetic Disaster

I spent the bulk of the afternoon messing about with a box of 100 crayons, some candles, and an empty Altoids box. Incredibly, it took me about an hour to create this melty monstrosity.

Dungeons and Dragons

It looks like someone stuck 700s wads of Big Mouth chewing gum to the lid. And how about that Dungeons and Dragons color scheme? Unmitigated aesthetic disaster.

I scraped it all off and started over, limiting myself this time to three colors—mint green, silver, and black. I’d go for a swanky retro look, just like this vintage mint-green automobile. Classy! Um, no, not really. When you turn me loose with crayons of that color palette, you end up with puke.

I started over yet again, this time resolving to use only one color—spring green. But I melted the crayon down to a nub long before I’d obliterated all traces of Altoids branding. I had no choice but to blindly follow my instincts about color (proven time and again to be very poor) and choose some supplementary colors. I selected a tealish blue and a darker green and resumed the melt-and-splatter routine. Once again, I found myself in Dungeons and Dragons territory. Why? How?

I couldn’t face the prospect of starting over one more time (I'd already spent far too much time on this!) so, throwing caution to the wind, I held the underside of the vomity-looking lid over the candle flame. All the little scabs of wax started to melt and swirl together in a very intriguing and satisfying way.


About time. I finally had something presentable. In case you’re wondering, all this pyromaniacal dicking around with the Altoids box came about because I needed a container for the magnets I made for the upcoming handmade-gift party. B encouraged me to decorate the box (something it hadn't occurred to me to do), and, basically, doing so squandered the better part of the afternoon. I think I spent more time on the ding-dong box than I did making the magnets.


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