Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Toothy Tony

B and I went to see The Queen last night. It could have just as easily been entitled The Prime Minister, because it’s pretty much all about Tony Blair—in fact, he’s practically deified by the end of the film for taking time out of his busy career as prime minister to gently badger the House of Windsor into realizing that they’d better acknowledge Princess Diana’s death in some public way. I ended up hating his character.

First of all, the teeth. Holy cats! Every time the Blair character smiled, I recoiled in horror. Those choppers are huge and sinister. I don’t trust them. I just spent some time Googling photos of Mr. Blair to see if the portrayal of his teeth in the film was accurate. Based on this photo of him on a site for some company named Fibrowatt, the movie teeth were spot on. That is some megaFibrowatt smile, Tony!

I imagine (hope) the actor playing him was wearing prosthetic teeth. Britain isn’t large enough for two sets of teeth like that.

Another thing that made me hate his character was that he was a big dork. At one point, he’s roaming around his flat dressed in a striped soccer jersey with “Blair” and a big "10" (for Number 10 Downing Street, get it, get it?) emblazoned on the back. Black and white vertical stripes, by the way. What? Is he a referee in his spare time? I don't get it. And he’s paired the jersey with a pair of what look to be black sanzibelt slacks. Ew!!!

Of course, this was just (at least I hope) a costume designer’s bad call, but I couldn’t help wondering...what if the real Tony Blair dresses like that when he’s just knocking about his flat with his family?

Do I care? I used to really like Tony Blair—the real Tony Blair. He seemed so articulate and sincere. A committed idealist. But he’s been a massive disappointment ever since he got so chummy with George W. Bush. What is that about? Blair’s the head of the LABOUR party and should be just about as far left of Bush as he can get himself. I was so disillusioned and confused by his unquestioning alignment with Bush’s agenda that I think I probably prejudged his character in the movie. Not that it really matters—it was just a movie and a Disney movie at that. I give it 2.5 stars.

Gosh. Two negative and intolerant blog posts in a row. An upbeat and nonjudgmental (or at least neutral) one next time. Promise!


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